Trinity,
When I was 20 I fell in love so easily. Now I’m 40
and I have trouble letting myself fall in love. Why is it
so hard at 40?
Lost Love, Jacksonville, Fla.
Hello Lost Love,
Sure, love at 20 meant long make-out sessions to Bee Gees
albums, but now at 40 love has to compete with long workdays,
internet malfunctions and the aging process. So, honey, if
you want love at 40 simply make time to find it instead of
wasting time complaining about it. Go out more, make more “moves” on
people you’re interested in and, lastly, make more
dates. Simply make more time to find love, and feeling it
will follow, I promise.
Hey Trinity,
Don’t you think therapy is a waste of time and money?
Don’t you think we can get though our problems alone?
Skeptical, Denver, Colo.
Hey Skeptical,
Sure sometimes you’re better off alone, but at other
times you really do need more than one mind to get you through
traumas, tragedies and men. Solving your own problems is
sweet, sweetie, but often it’s better to hire a trained
professional to help me — I mean you — with those
no good, lying, cheating men. Now didn’t letting that
out feel good?
Dearest Trinity,
I try to work up the courage to talk to guys that I find
attractive, but I always say the wrong thing or nothing
at all, plus experience that overwhelming fear of rejection.
How can I get past my own shyness to tell someone I like
them?
Too Shy For Words, Austin, Texas
Dearest Too Shy For Words,
To get over my shyness, my fear of rejection and my fear
of saying the wrong thing I took acting classes, Insight
Seminars and pushed myself to just say “hello.” Start
by breathing a few times before approaching someone; letting
your shyness be natural — it’s often more cute
than you think; and start your night off with a martini.
God made
martinis for a reason, baby.
Hey
Trinity,
I frequently go to bars and chat online but still no bites.
What more can I do without spending everyday and night looking
for a date/mate?
Enough’s Enough, Detroit, Mich.
Dear Enough’s Enough,
It’s not enough to hit the bars or chat online hoping,
pumpkin, dating is work. Make a commitment to yourself to follow:
Trinity’s Practical Dating Declarations
1. Practice: I promise to date even if “I think” it
won’t work out, simply because it builds my character
analysis and intuition.
2. Consistency: I promise to get right back on the dating horse
even when I have more than two bad dates in a row.
3. Help: I promise to ask friends, relatives and coworkers
to set me up on dates even if they’re blind dates.
4. Packaging: I promise to look and act my best and keep my
problems to myself, at least until the fourth date.
5. Timing: I promise to be on time, be clear if I have to be
late and be open to changing times if someone has to.
6. Honesty: I promise to be as honest as I can about my feelings
even if it means telling someone what they don’t want
to hear.
7. Obsessing: I promise not to call more than once a day or
leave more than two (calm) messages in one week’s time.
8. Self-respect: I promise to date people who treat me with
respect and
kindness and to do the same to them.
9. Survival: I promise to end all bad,
self-destructive and/or dangerous situations even if it means
leaving town for a week.
10. Lastly, Risk: I promise to give each date a chance even
if it means being less self-righteous, self-loathing or
self-indulgent.
Don’t let your questions go unanswered!
With a Masters of Divinity, Reverend Trinity was host of Spiritually
Speaking, a weekly radio drama and now performs globally.
info:
web: www.telltrinity.com
email: Trinity@telltrinity.com
mail: Tell Trinity
PO Box 1362
P-town, MA 02657-5362
Sponsored by:
Provincetown Business Guild
800-637-8696 www.ptown.org
Don’t let your answers go unanswered!
— With a Masters of Divinity, Reverend Trinity was host of “Spiritually Speaking,” a weekly radio drama and now performs globally.
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