Hello
Trinity,
When I was 20 I fell in love easily. Now I’m 40 and I have trouble
letting myself fall in love. Why is it so hard to feel love at 40? All
I want is to feel the love I once knew.
Lost Love, Jacksonville, Fla.
Hello Lost Love,
At 20 love is magical, beautiful and fills every hour. But at 40 there
are bills to pay, traffic to fight and daily moisturizing which takes up
a lot of the energy we once used on love. Then when we finally have time
for love, which usually comes after 8 p.m. or on Saturday nights, we’re
just plain tired. Now, honey, if you want love at 40 simply make time to
find it and time to feel it. Simply reconstruct your image of love so that
it fits your schedule. Now get moisturizing.
Dearest Trinity,
I started dating someone with whom I talk a lot on the phone. Sometimes
I wait for him to say goodnight first and sometimes he waits for me.
Is it better to let him say goodnight first or me first?
Who’s Off First, Providence, R.I.
Dearest Who’s Off First,
According to the book, “The Rules,” you are important. Your
time is important. And you must always be too busy to talk all night. So,
sweetie, it’s you who must always say goodnight first. Why? Because
you want to keep your date wanting more.
Dearest Trinity,
Don’t you think looks are not as important as what one says, does
or feels? Don’t you think looks are secondary?
Insiders View, Phoenix, Ariz.
Dearest Insiders View,
Of course what’s inside is key, but looks are all someone has to
judge you by when they first notice and meet you. After a few meetings,
then you can let your hair down — just a little. So, pumpkin, instead
of fighting it, go with it and always try to look (and smell) your best.
That’s how the animal kingdom works — at least in my jungle.
Hey
Trinity,
Recently my lover announced that he “wants to try an open relationship.” I
hate that word. How do I talk him out of it?
Closing The Opening, Minneapolis, Minn.
Hey Closing The Opening,
Aren’t relationships just a bitch?
Listen, I’d like to send you my “Positive Arguments For Starting
An Open Relationship” and I’d like you to send your lover:
Trinity’s Negative Arguments For Starting An Open Relationship
1. Love: If you or your partner falls in love with someone else everything
is over.
2. Diseases: If one of you “slips” up the other one will also
catch the “slipper.”
3. Balance: If one partner gets too crazy while the other one hardly indulges
at all, there will be a major imbalance.
4. Dissatisfaction: If someone else pleases your partner more than you,
then the sex between you two may get boring or nonexistent.
5. Jealousy: If you go home with someone while your partner has no one
to go home with, someone may get jealous.
6. The Game: If you think finding other people to have an open relationship
with is easy, try finding a cheap divorce lawyer.
7. The Search: If finding someone else means going out, searching the internet
and so on, that means less time to work on your own relationship.
8. The Rythmn: If one of you isn’t on the same sexual schedule as
the other one, you may not be able to keep both sex-lives going for long.
9. The Third One: If someone else decides they want you or your mate, you
both now have to deal with someone else’s stalking, obsessions and
desires.
10. Lastly, Your Other Problems: If you start an open relationship, this
doesn’t mean your other problems will disappear or any new problems
won’t appear.
Don’t let your questions go unanswered!
With a Masters of Divinity, Reverend Trinity was host of Spiritually Speaking,
a weekly radio drama and now performs globally.
Don’t let your answers go unanswered!
— With a Masters of Divinity, Reverend Trinity was host of “Spiritually Speaking,” a weekly radio drama and now performs globally.
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