Dear
Trinity,
About a month ago I came out to my wife, two kids and to my very straight
job. My wife was great, but my job couldn’t handle it so I was fired.
Did I do the right thing?
Ouch, I’m Out, Ottawa, Canada
Dear Ouch,
Being yourself, freeing yourself, saying who you are and surrounding yourself
with supportive people — even if it means changing jobs, neighborhoods
or family situations — will always be the greatest and holiest gift
you can give yourself and the world around you. Yes, honey, you did a great
thing.
Dear Trinity,
I’m gay, live in a small town and have trouble meeting dates. The
population is 2,000. Any ideas on how to survive not so alone?
Population Troubles, Provincetown, Mass.
Dear Population Troubles,
Honestly, the best way to find a date in a small town is to move out. Bigger
cities mean bigger dating opportunities. Sorry, sweetie, but if finding
a relationship is your priority, moving out may have to become your reality.
I did it and my dating life, amongst many other things, soared.
Hey
Trinity,
How do I meet more people when I only go out once in a while?
Trapped At Home, Nashville, Tenn.
Hey Trapped,
On those rare nights when you do go out, make sure to look overly attractive
and talk to as many people as you can. Don’t waste these rare outings.
The more people you get the attention of and talk to the better your chances
are. Meeting people is a numbers game, pumpkin, so play it big!
Dearest
Trinity,
Last week I made a date with the bouncer of a bar I frequent. But he
got excited and told people, which “weirded” me out, so I never
showed up. Now he won’t let me in the bar. I apologized, but he says
I’m not welcome. What should I do?
Stood Up/Kicked Out, Minneapolis, Minn.
Dearest SU/KO,
I know you’d like me to say he should forgive you and let you in,
but what were you thinking when you stood him up? Don’t you know
how evil and inhumane it is to stand someone up! Listen, baby, send flowers,
an apology card and keep trying, but more importantly read:
Trinity’s
Disastrous Tips For What You Did To Someone When You Stood Them Up
1.
You made him leave work early, clean his apartment and get all dressed
up just to spend the evening feeling confused,
distrusting and dirty.
2. You got her all worked up for a good date just to waste a good night
working on a good cry.
3. You made him cook a fancy dinner and open an expensive bottle of wine
just to watch the wine age and the food get moldy.
4. You made her pace the floor, stare at the clock and check her voicemail
endlessly hoping that she didn’t meet another loser.
5. You made him lay painfully on the couch wondering, “Did I say
something wrong?” “Did I get the time right?” Or, “Am
I going to be alone forever?”
6. You made her call friends, family and 1-900-4-C-R-I-S-I-S to get help
and support for issues she hasn’t dealt with since 10th grade.
7. You made him wish angry, unhealthy and negative things about you and
maybe himself, plus you ruined, once again, someone’s dream of a
relationship.
8. You made her obsess about love, honesty, time and life — need
I go on.
9. You set him up with all your promises just to let him down with all
your narcissistic, egotistical and arrogant behavior.
10. Lastly, you made her wait alone, at a bar, a restaurant or at home
like a prisoner, a victim or a punished criminal when all she wanted to
do was to get to know you better.
Don’t let your answers go unanswered!
— With a Masters of Divinity, Reverend Trinity was host of “Spiritually Speaking,” a weekly radio drama and now performs globally.
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