Dearest Trinity,
I’m lost without him. He’s 19 and I’m 37. You see, we worked together and I never told him that I loved him because I knew he’d run away from me. But, he quit his job. Now, I went to see if his family had seen him. They said, “No!” What can I do? I miss him so.
Lost, Detroit, Mich.
Dear Lost,
I’m sorry he’s gone and you never got to express your feelings, but visiting his family? Sweetie, have you ever been called “obsessive” or been accused of being a “stalker.” Love often means letting someone go, not hunting someone down. Yes, you love him, but when a 37-year-old chases a 19-year-old that’s also stalking. It’s time you read my tips on “Stopping Yourself From Being A Stalker.” Email me. I’ll send ’em to you. And, for now, keep busy, keep meeting other potential love interests (closer to your age) and, lastly, please take your childish mind off this mindless child.
Hi Trinity,
Whenever I think I’m ready for a relationship I jump in feet first and start dating one person. But after a while one of us loses interest and one of us ends up hurt. Maybe it’s better to stay single the rest of my life?
Single & Lonely, Wichita, Kan.
Hi S&L,
The bad news is keeping your or someone else’s interest is constant work. The good news is keeping someone or you interested is what makes life interesting. As you get to know someone you’ll find it easier to keep the relationship interesting, I promise. For now, keep trying new things with the same lover, be it traveling, social events, sexual adventures or creating likeminded hobbies. And, darling, keep dating till it kills you — I mean fills you — with experiences.
Dear Trinity,
How do you know if someone is born sensitive, artistic and/or gay? What are the signs?
Wondering, New Hope, Pa.
Dear Wondering,
My parents used to say that they knew something was “different” about me, so I guess I gave signs. Children also say whatever is on their mind. So, honey, listen closely and they’ll tell you in their own way. (See the cartoon for more hints.)
Dear Trinity,
You’ve talked about hitchhiking but never disclosed any helpful information. Any advice? I’m ready to try?
Hitchhiking Dreams, Berkeley, Calif.
Dear Dreams,
Yes, I was once a “professional” hitchhiker and loved it. So, pumpkin, be careful and read:
Trinity’s Thumbs Up Tips For Hitchhiking
1. Always carry a sketchpad and a thick black and yellow marker. Draw the names clearly, in large letters, of the next largest city you are going to.
2. Don’t look or smell unkempt. Look clean and not too sexy. And don’t disguise yourself with hats and sunglasses. It resembles someone incognito.
3. Have a knapsack. Knapsacks resemble a traveling student. Runaways carry luggage or a pillowcase tied to a stick.
4. Get the American Youth Hostel Guide and stay there. They have ride boards, cheap restaurants and more. It’s usually only a days-hitchhike away from each hostel.
5. Don’t carry drugs. It’s not worth it. One day, I’ll tell you about my Texas experience.
6. Stand, don’t sit, by an on ramp.
7. Don’t disclose too much about yourself. For some folks religion and sexual orientation are reasons to kill you. One day, I’ll tell you about my Georgia experience.
8. Your travel kit must include a map, water bottle, money (in your sneakers) ID, a rain poncho, nutritional bars and a diary.
9. You will be challenged by time, weather, people, the police and dangerous confrontations, so learn to live with it.
10. And, most importantly, it’s dangerous, just like skydiving and racing, so expect the worst and deal with it like a pro.
PS. Always make sure there’s an inside door handle before you get in.
Don’t let your answers go unanswered!
— With a Masters of Divinity, Reverend Trinity was host of “Spiritually Speaking,” a weekly radio drama and now performs globally.
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