Hey
Trinity,
I met this guy at the bar and brought him home for some lovin’. Well,
he turned into a sex pig, spitting, swearing, choking and more. I’m
not vanilla, but when sex gets too dirty or painful it turns me off. How
do you know if someone wants a “scene” rather than just good
sex?
Sex Or X, Denver, Colo.
Hey Sex Or X,
With one-night stands you have to take a stand. Just ask, “What do
you like?” and then listen for key words like kissing, passion and
affection versus bondage, spitting and raunch. Some people are way more
X-rated and can easily make you feel vanilla for just wanting good ole
sex. Honey, next time be clear before letting a complete stranger take
you to his dungeon.
Hey Trinity,
My lover and I don’t have sex anymore and I’m sure he’s
cheating on me. Am I wrong if I cheat on him?
Sex, Lies And Cheating, Boston, Mass.
Hey Sex Lies And Cheating,
First of all sex is a gift not a tool with which to punish someone. That
only happens on afternoon soap operas. So, yes, you’re wrong for
cheating even if your lover cheats on you. However, sweetie, you’re
right to do something less dramatic, such as sit down together like two
sane adults and talk about your problems. Either agree to try an open relationship
or agree to separate for a while, but end the drama today.
Dearest
Trinity,
I have a wonderful boyfriend. The only trouble is that he likes to take
his shirt off at the club and therefore insists on shaving regularly. He
looks great, but it’s so prickly. I’d prefer him au natural.
How can I bring this up in a sensitive manner?
Seriously Over Stubbled,
Laguna Beach, Calif.
Dearest SOS,
Before opening a can of worms I always start with a bottle of wine. It
sets the mood. Once he’s feeling tipsy, let him know how great he
is, how much you love him and how much his shaving is making your love
life “uncomfortable.” Sweetie, if he loves you he’ll
toss the razor. But if he’s an egotistical, selfish man with low
self-esteem (like most men), he’ll never see your point, unless,
of course, you do the same (hint, hint)!
Hello
Trinity,
I’m new to the dating scene. I just got out of a 10-year relationship
to the only person I have ever dated. Do you have any fast-learning dating
rules?
Back After Ten Years, Savannah, Ga.
Hello Back After Ten,
I’ve been working on a book but it won’t be ready anytime soon.
However, pumpkin, a TV series called “Sex In The City” pretty
much covers it all. Take a weekend and rent the six seasons. But for now
read:
Trinity’s
Most Critical Aspects Of Dating According To ‘Sex In The City’
1.
The first most critical aspect of dating is sex. “Be good in bed.”
2. The second is, “have a stylish apartment and date people with
style.”
3. The third is, “when you start feeling something, it’s working.”
4. The fourth is, “wait a while before talking about your exes.”
5. The fifth is, “knowing that it all happens for a reason.”
6. The sixth is, “there’s no such thing as easy. Even if your
date is easy, easy doesn’t last forever.”
7. The seventh, “accepting that when a man’s not interested,
he’s just not interested.”
8. The eighth, “just when you figure it all out — you may not
have.”
9. The ninth, “the chances that it may not work out are far greater,
especially when you don’t work at it.”
10. And, the last most critical aspect of dating is, “dream, take
risks, tell it like it is and always try to look your best.”
Don’t let your answers go unanswered!
— With a Masters of Divinity, Reverend Trinity was host of “Spiritually Speaking,” a weekly radio drama and now performs globally.
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