Queer sex slang: Know it or beware

Your brief guide to surviving in the online world of sex Online Only

by QNotes Staff  Staff Reports  editor@goqnotes.com
Published: June 1, 2009 in A&E / Life&Style

Online cruising can be difficult — and sometimes downright frustrating — when everyone you chat with seems to be writing in a non-sense, mumble-jumble of words, letters, acronyms and phrases. All those seemingly endless lists of letters all have a meaning; some are pretty innocent, others not so much. If you expect to survive in the world of the online hookup (see the companion article, “Online dating, online fun”), you’d better know your stuff.

If you’re not one for sexual discussions, or the game of online dating and hooking up just doesn’t interest you, this feature might not be for you.

420 — seeks sexual partner who also enjoys use or marijuana before, during or after sex. see pnp.

bb — barebacking (condomless sex).

b/d — bondage and discipline; bondage is the use of restraints for sexual pleasure. see s/m.

bttm — bottom; the receptive partner during anal sex.

clean — can refer to physical cleanliness, but more often implies being “clean” from drugs or STDs.

ddf — drug, disease free.

discreet — respecting or maintaining respect, silence, modesty, privacy; may refer to a closeted individual.

dl — downlow or closeted.

fem — feminine

generous — if seeking generous, individual expects or hopes for payment in return for sexual services; a generous person might exchange money for the company of another person for sexual services. see working boy/girl.

hwp — height-weight proportionate.

iso — i seek only, in search of.

jo — jacking off.

ltr — long-term relationship.

masc — masculine.

m4m — male looking for a male.

m4mm — male looking for male couple.

mm4m — male couple looking for male.

mwm (mbm) — married white or black man; middle initial can be substituted according to race.

nsa — no strings attached.

pnp — party and play (use of alcohol and/or drugs before, during or after sex).

s/m — sadomasochism; sadism is the sexual (or non-sexual) enjoyment of inflicting pain or humiliation upon someone else; masochism is the sexual (or non-sexual) enjoyment of receiving pain or humiliation. see b/d.

safe — safe sex practices, condom use, etc.

stats — statistics, as in height, weight, age, waist size, race, hair and eye color, preferred sexual positions (see top, bottom, vers), etc.

stud — a masculine or aggressive female lesbian or bisexual.

top — the insertive partner during anal sex.

vers — versatile; a person who enjoys both giving and receiving anal sex.

vgl — very good looking

working boy/girl — someone who expects payment in return for sexual services. see generous.

w4w — woman looking for a woman.

w4ww — woman looking for a female couple.

ww4w — female couple looking for a woman.

ws — water sports (playing with urine). see Wiktionary’s definition for “urophilia.”

yo — years old, as in “45yo.”